不登校,ブログ,対処法,解決策,ノウハウ,知識不登校,ブログ,対処法,解決策,ノウハウ,知識

自分の家族を学校でバカにされたら

不登校の原因で、学校でいじめにあったというのは非常に多いです。

いじめというレベルにまでは到らなくても、友人関係がこじれたり、友だちに嫌なことを言われたことがきっかけとなって学校に行けなくなることはよくあります。


私はこれが原因で不登校になったわけではないですが、こんなことがありました。

大好きな兄のことをバカにされるのが苦手だった

兄は生まれつき重度の障害時だった

私の兄は、生まれる時に高熱を出し続けたことが原因で、歩く・話すといった機能が失われた障害児でした。

しかし、私にとっては生まれた時から兄はそういう状態なので、特に疑問を抱くことはなく、一緒にいると心が落ち着く存在でした。

兄をバカにされて取っ組み合いの激しいケンカをした

私が小学校3年生のとき、友だちがつい兄の悪口を私に言ってしまい、取っ組み合いのケンカをしてしまいました。大好きな兄の悪口を言われたのが許せなかったのです。もともと兄のことをみんなも知っていたのですが、そのケンカをきっかけに改めてクローズアップされてしまい、なんともクラスの居心地が悪くなりました。

母親の教え

どんどん見てもらいなさい

私は、兄がバカにされたのに相手に対して怒らない母を家で強く非難しました。その時に母からこんなことを言われました。

「お兄ちゃんのことを隠す必要はない。まず見てもらって、障害児について考えてもらわないと、お兄ちゃんのことを理解してもらうことはできないんだよ。」

人がどう思うかは関係ない

「人それぞれ好きな動物が違うようにいろんな考えがある。お兄ちゃんを見てどう考えるかは、もう自分たち家族にはどうしようもない。でも、自分が好きな犬を人が嫌いでも別に関係ないでしょ。犬が好きって話せばいいし、犬と仲良く遊んだらいい。だから、相手がどう思おうが気にすることはないの。自分がお兄ちゃんのことを大好きだということが一番大事だよ。

最後に

人の意見は人の意見です。自分にできることは相手に働きかけることだけで、人の考えをコントロールすることはできません。


重要なことは「自分がどう思うか」です。自分にとって大事なものをバカにされると悲しい気持ちになるのは自然なことですが、それでそのものの価値が下がるわけではありません。気にせずに、大事に思う自分の気持ちを大切にしてください。


嫌なことを言われた時の対応について、ゆーくろっくのメンターは一緒に考えるので、いつでもご相談ください。

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