月曜日というのは、大人も子どももゆうつなものです。
サザエさん病という言葉があるように、サザエさんが放送される日曜の夕食時あたりから、大人は明日からの仕事のことを、子どもは学校のことを考えてしまい、ゆううつになってしまいます。
元気に毎日学校に通っている子どもですらゆううつになるので、不登校から少しずつ学校に行けるようになった子どもや、学校を休みがちな子ども、普段から学校を嫌がっている子どもは、特に苦痛を感じてしまいます。
一方で、ゆーくろっくの利用者を見ていると、月曜日に学校に行けた週と行けない週を比較すると、月曜に行けた週は出席率が大きく上がり、行けなかった週は出席率ががくんと下がる傾向にあります。
やはり、月曜日という週のスタートをどうきるかで1週間全体が大きく変わってくるのです。
そこで今日は、ゆーくろっくでおすすめしている「学校に行きたがらない子どもへの日曜夜の対策」をご紹介します。
対策① 日曜の夜はゆっくり過ごせるように予定をいれない
子どもが学校のことを考えずにすむようにと、日曜の夜に楽しい活動を計画する親御さんがいますが、それは逆効果です。
人間は嫌なことが後に控えていると、楽しいことをしていてもその事だけを考えてしまうのです。
その理由は、人間の最も強い感情は「恐怖」だからです。
人間も含めて動物は、外敵の危険、不都合な環境の変化、自身の飢えをいち早く察知して自分自身に危険信号を出す必要があるため、恐怖が最も強い感情になっているのです。
恐怖をしずめるためには、なによりもまずリラックスすることが必要です。
日曜で予定を入れるのは日中の午後までとし、夕方以降は家で穏やかに過ごすのが良いのです。
対策② まず月曜に行くことだけを考えるように言う
仕事や学校のことを考えて日曜の夜にゆううつな時、人は、”月曜日が嫌”なのではなく、”月曜に始まるつらい1週間”が嫌なのです。
月曜単体ではなく1週間全体に着目しているのです。もし仮に、月曜が登校日で火曜水曜が休みであれば、そのゆううつはぐっと小さくなるはずです。
だから、日曜の夜にお子さんが学校に行くことにゆうつになっていたら、「まず明日がんばって行こう。火曜以降のことは明日行ってからまた考えよう」と伝えてあげることが大事です。
ただし、「明日行ったら火曜は休んでいいから」とは決して言ってはいけません。
子どもは都合のいいように大人の言葉を受け取る時があります。
実際、月曜に行って火曜に休むこともあるかもしれません。
それでも月曜に休むよりははるかに良いのですが、最初から火曜に休むことが前提なのはおかしな話です。火曜にどうするかは、月曜に学校に行ってから子ども考えてください。
対策③ 月曜日の夜に子どもが楽しみになることを計画する
これはとても有効な方法です。
つらいことが控えている中で楽しいことをやっても楽しめませんが、つらいことの後に楽しいことが控えていると人は前向きな気持ちになれるし、がんばれるからです。
月曜は30分門限を伸ばす、夜にお父さんと一緒にゲームする、好きなデザートを食べられる、就寝時間を30分遅くしていい、などのごほうびをゆーくろっくではおすすめしています。
最後に
1日終わった時にいっぱいほめてあげることが翌日へのモチベーションを高め、金曜日に1週間の中でがんばったことをいっぱいほめてあげることが翌週へのモチベーションを高めます。
ご紹介した方法をぜひ積極的にためして、お子さまが月曜日に明るく学校に行けるようにしてあげてください。
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